Article by Joanna Buoniconti

What would you do if you saw someone being bullied, or were being bullied
yourself? Would you confront the person, or would you walk away and linger in
your own fear? Growing up, everyone has heard the cliche saying, “Sticks and
stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me.” That saying is cliche
for a good reason, because it’s not true. Words can and do hurt, with the right
momentum they can cut very deeply into a person’s soul!

The issue of bullying has turned into a full-blown epidemic. The question
becomes now, how can we put an end to this issue. The answer is rather simple,
awareness. It is a well acknowledged fact that a majority of victims of bullying
never do or have an extremely hard time admitting to someone that they’re being
bullied, because many see it as a reflection of themselves. When in reality, it is a
projection of the perpetrator’s own issues. Bullying is not only damaging to
self-esteem on a personal level, but to a population as well. Because what does
that say about humans, if we’re so eager to tear each other down instead of lifting
each other up? In having the chance to speak to the executive director of Unify, a
local anti-bullying organization, Chris Maiwald explains how this organization is
unlike any other because they have made it their mission to place the power back
into the hands of the victims by encouraging them to be better advocates for
themselves when faced with situations of adversity.

How did the project of Unify come about?
The project of Unify was founded in January 2016, by the Zemba family. The
photography studio is known for beautiful and remarkable ability to capture
life’s celebratory moments: from senior pictures to wedding portraits. And while
photographing upcoming seniors in high school, they heard stories from students
about experiences that they’ve had with being bullied and were able to gain
insight into the severity of the issue.

How did Chris Maiwald become involved in this organization?
Seeing as how lack of confidence is becoming an increasingly prevalent issue
within society, and is arguably linked to the intensity of the bullying issue. In
order to remedy this, an idea of a fashion show was presented in order to boost
confidence. In the spring of 2015, a few months prior to the launch of the project,
the Zembas put on the first Unify Fashion Show, which has since become their
most well-known fundraiser. It was through attending the first fashion show, that
Maiwald became involved in the project. She recalls being impressed in seeing
the show and her and her husband became board members after that. But she
recalls what really piqued her interest was that the message behind the fashion
show revolved around acceptance and positivity. “We celebrate all sizes, shapes,
ethnicities, sexual orientations, and physical abilities. The kids also do a
performance aspect, that shows some kids bullying another child and what the
effects are on that person. It brings that awareness to the young people in the
audience to say, ‘Oh, that’s not good!’ ” With living in a highly critical society, it is
good to have a reminder every now and then to watch what we say to other
people; because like actions, words also have consequences.

Maiwald has been a part of the company since its very early stages, but she didn’t
assume the title of executive director right off the bat. She had previously helped
her husband run his business, however, ever since its launching the company
had been expanding at a rapid rate and it became evident that there was a need
for an executive director. Being a grandmother of seven and also having gone
through experiences with her own son being bullied when he was younger, Sarah
developed a soft spot for this organization. She was also inspired by the need that
she witnessed for this organization within the community, which eventually led
her to leave her husband’s business and volunteering to be the executive director
of Unify.

What is Unify’s method for preventing bullying on social media?
Seeing as how bullying is such a widespread issue, Unify has made it their
mission to try to come up with ways of how to combat negativity across all outlets
that we encounter in everyday life. The Unify Selfie Hand Challenge was their
first project and a way to stop bullying over social media. October is National
Bullying Prevention Month and since its founding, October 1st has been the
designated date that the selfie challenge began. Participants write the word Unify
on the back of their hand, to symbolize togetherness in standing up against this
issue; and cover their mouth while taking the picture, in order to signify the
silence associated with bullying. The first year that the challenge took place the
goal was for it to last 50 days, and to have participants from all 50 states and 50
other countries. In both 2017 and 2018, the young adults coming up with these
ideas have challenged themselves to get 50 celebrities to participate, last year
they reached out to these celebrities and successfully achieved their goal.
There is something to be said for good peer pressure, which often comes from
celebrities recognizing or taking a stand for a cause. We don’t hear about the
good effects of social media as much as the negative ones, but the fact is that it is
just as easy to make social media a positive and empowering space as it is for it to
be a negative one. Chris Maiwald explains one instance where bullying was
prevented through seeing a celebrity’s post about the Selfie Challenge: “One
young man that wants to be a wrestler that was on there that did it [the
challenge], he wrote on Facebook, ‘I was going to bully and then I saw my favorite
actor doing your selfie challenge and that made me choose not to bully.’ ” It
doesn’t have to take seeing your favorite celebrity to make the decision not to
bully, it should be common sense. But when bullying does occur saying
something as simple as STOP has the proven power to stop a bully dead in their
tracks.

What other community outreach does the project do; specifically, what is their
approach for handling bullying in schools?
The Selfie Challenge has become Unify’s way of combating bullying on social
media. But their work doesn’t stop there, in fact, it was just the beginning! Due to
the nature of the organization, community outreach to young adults and children
has become a fundamental aspect of the project. As the executive director, Chris
Maiwald, is involved in every aspect of this. But given how the younger
generations are the most affected by bullying and are the face of the
organization, it makes sense that they would be the ones to drive the company
forward.
There are a lot of creative people in the world and in order to fulfill their goal of
stimulating growth and positivity within every aspect of the human character,
Unify has created a grant awarding process to fund local anti-bullying initiatives.
The projects are meant to benefit children and young adults within school or
community settings (age 18 and under), since schools have historically been a
setting where bullying occurs. Their goal in doing this is to involve the younger
generations as much as possible, because they are the ones that see and deal with
bullies on a daily basis, therefore what better people to raise awareness on the
issue. Last year they gave ten $1000 grants away, and one of the recipients efforts
really stuck with Maiwald: “It was for a program called ‘Be A Friend Project.’ An
adult came up with the idea, and we’ve continued with the project every month.
The project is that she chooses one student [in any part of the country] who has
been severely bullied. I mean, to the point that these kids have been in the
hospital and attempted suicide, she picks one child each month and sends a story
to them, and we all write letters of encouragement. They are called ‘Be A Friend’
letters and it has grown drastically since she’s started doing it. Now, the child gets
like 1300-1500 letters a month from people all over the country!” Bullying is an
isolating issue, because many victims of it feel as though they are alone and that
no one cares about them. This initiative provides comfort and hope to
individuals, who are in a dark place, that they are never as alone as they think.
The grant submission process ended on September 30. The awards ceremony will
take place on Tuesday, October 23, at Twin Hills Country Club in Longmeadow.
During the ceremony $15,000 Unify will be awarding $15,000 to the chosen
recipients and, in addition $1000 will be awarded on behalf of Paul Mitchell Neon
to one applicant. The people of Unify are especially excited about this event,
because during it the “Hero” award is going to be presented for the first time to
Cheyenne Cappella. Due to her exemplification of admirable strength and
abominable spirit while overcoming adversity. Everyone is invited to attend the
event.
A new part of the organization that Unify has recently started doing is peer
presentations. For young people to share their experiences about bullying, they
have to be vulnerable and raw, which is never an easy thing to do. But when
people are vulnerable, others listen. It is important for people of all ages,
especially children, to listen to others stories on bullying so that they can
recognize bullying for what it is. Projection of another person’s issues onto the
innocent. Because once people stop taking it so personally will the issue finally
not rear pain and destruction.

Being a grandmother and wanting to protect the young ones in her family in any
way that she can, undoubtedly, played a large hand in Chris Maiwald being
drawn to this organization. While it is only located in Western Mass, she hopes
that Unify will spread globally. Maiwald encourages everyone who has been or is
being bullied to speak up. Choosing to be silent makes someone a victim and is
only giving the bully more power; whereas, choosing not to be silent gives you
your power back! Empowerment has to start within ourselves, but with Unify,
individuals can gain a sense of community and their voices back in order to
recover from the hurtful words that are thrown carelessly like knives. As a
society, we need to welcome diversity, not fight against it, and Unify is the
launching pad for this change to finally occur.

For more information on Unify and for details on upcoming events, visit
www.unifyagainstbullying.org.